So, I've been thinking about becoming a professional poker player. I play small tournaments at local casinos, play free tournaments at bars around town, play online poker all the time.

The problem is, playing poker is all I think about. I've started playing poker all the time at work, online, and it's starting to affect my on-the-job performance.

Is there anyone else out there as fucked up as I am? (And please, Dear Abby, don't tell me to seek counseling. There's not a counselor out there that can help my sick and twisted mind.)